Catching-up before Jingle Bells & Mistletoe

I know I know it has been way too long since my last blog describing the beautiful event which was Tristan and Trish’s surprise wedding on 23 August 2025.

With the countdown to the festive season in full force, and with a big personal change occurring on  December 2025 for me, now is the time for an update blog.

It has been quite a ride – August ended with me having to get my 93 year old Mom to declutter as 1 September 2025 saw me orchestrating and organising her moving from her cottage at her retirement village to the assisted living accommodation at the same retirement village.   The accommodation is a bedsit – one big room with 2 generously sized built in cupboards, a small outdoor patio and an en-suite bathroom with basin, shower and toilet.   The move was necessitated for financial reasons and it was a headache and stress but thankfully my Mom is happily settled and adjusting, she is happy to have some semblance of independence again but grateful for the assistance with her washing and dressing at the beginning and ending of each day.   The room is monitored at all times by a discreet camera and assistance is also available at the push of her panic button.  She has all her meals in the dining room and this cost together with the care and accommodation is covered in one monthly rental amount.  It was exhausting and found I grossly underestimated the stress I was under; but its done and the decluttering bug bit me hard too which is not a bad thing of course!

My birthday on Saturday, 4 October 2025 was a fabulous whirlwind – a wonderful breakfast at a lovely relaxed coffee shop, Izzie's, with family and friends, followed by some time with my Mom and ending the day watching the Downtown Abbey movie – the last of the Downton Abbey story and as a die-hard Downtown Abbey fan this was a fantastic birthday treat.   The next day Morgan, Isabel and I enjoyed a sound bath experience which was wonderful – it was the second one I had experienced and it was just as incredible as the first one.   It was part of Morgan and Isabel’s very generous birthday present to me and the treats did not end there – coffee and a delicious cupcake followed. I was so spoilt, treated, pampered and celebrated - what an honour for which I am so grateful for all my beautiful family and friends.

Our good friends, Maure and Riaan got married on 11 October 2025 – Johan provided magical entertainment for the guests while the happy couple were having their photos taken and during the reception he performed more incredible magic which enthralled and entranced the bridal couple and guests alike.   The beautiful bridal couple treated Johan and I to an overnight stay at their wedding accommodation which was fantastic and it was really special to enjoy breakfast with them and some family members before we headed home.

For me, work ‘exploded’ in October – which was incredible and I am so grateful.   I was so busy the entire month with all my clients and that was amazing, definitely a change for the better for my small business and me!  

November was quieter for me in terms of work but ticked along as did my Yaga shop (Yaga being the South African equivalent of pre-loved shopping apps like Vinted and e-Bay).

Highlights of the last 3 months besides those already mentioned:

• A visit from Nick (my eldest brother from the UK) and a lovely outing with Nick, Mom, Johan and me to Random Harvest Indigenous Nursery; and a wonderful braai / barbeque which Trish and Tristan generously hosted for Nick, and us (Morgan and Isabel unfortunately, at the last minute, could not attend)

• Special fun get togethers with a selection of my girl friends attending incredibly interesting and educational workshops (colour and style) led by the very professional and talented Liana Kaminsky breakfasts, coffees, teas, lunches, at Izzie's, Supercalifragilistic Bakery, Doppio Zero (in Sandton), Benita's, Silver Birch, La Cucina di Ciro and Carbon Cafe

• Dog-sitting the adorable Saint and housesitting for Morgan and Isabel while they enjoyed a great 2 night getaway at Quiet Mountain Lodge in the Magaliesberg courtesy of one of Morgan's very generous clients;

• Attending the opening of Angie's exhibition as part of her fulfilment of her Master's in Visual Arts (her second Masters!) - it is an incredible exhibition and testimony to her incredible hard work and preparation from cutting and sanding the fibreglass sculptures, editing the visuals, designing and creating the perspex display, producing an amazing video, generating a highly glossy catalogue - so many beautiful components of this mesmerising exhibition : https://art.angielazaro.com/pose-ssed/

• Reconnecting with a friend who, due to circumstances, contact was lost approximately 34 years ago. I was doing my own personal decluttering and found a postcard dated February 1991 of the Arc de Triomphe - it had been sent to me by Jaki and discovering the postcard made me hunt for a photo I knew I had with her, along with Morgan who was 20 months old at the time. Though I knew Jaki from Grahamstown (she was American and living and working in Grahamstown having studied at Rhodes University) we had met up in London (my folks had flown Morgan and I to London while they flew there from the USA and we had a great Christmas with Nick, Pat, Rachel and Philip). I located an email address for Jaki and sent her a copy of the postcard and the photograph as I was not sure if I had the right person - I did and what was wild is that Jaki told me she had, a few months ago, been sorting through her photo storage box and found the identical photo and wondered what had happened to Morgan and me. Jaki is a realtor in the USA and it is so special to be back in contact with her. I am still quite blown away!

• Attending the annual Cocaine Anonymous South Africa Convention at the beautiful Glenburn Lodge venue. Co-Anon South Africa, the family and friends support group, which I am a proud and grateful member of, are always invited to the conventions and we had a fabulous meeting during the programme of events on Saturday, 29 November 2025. From the shares from the international speakers who have 30+ years of sobriety and clean-time, to witnessing the 'clean time countdown' to the HUGE circle at the end, which filled the entire auditorium everyone holding hands for the closing and reciting the serenity prayer, it was such a powerful uplifting event. What a privilege it was to be there and to be part of this incredible community - just one of my infinite reasons why I am a grateful member of Co-Anon, why I keep coming back and make every effort to be present in person at the physical meetings as the physical connection and unity is beyond powerful.

• I had a real 'pinch-me' moment at my local public library where I popped in to return a book and look for a new one to take out for my Mom. The librarian was very excited to tell me and show me that my debut book, "My Son Went to Rehab, I Went to Rome - A Journey of Hope" was in circulation and there it was on display! Along with the 'pinch me' feeling, goosebumps appeared on my arms and I felt quite emotional - not least that it was displayed right next to the amazing Rassie Erasmus's book. The librarian showed me that my book had already been checked out 4 times since it was in circulation and I hope that at least one of those readers, were helped whether it was the story of my youngest son's struggle with the disease of addiction or my narration of the time we spent in Rome. 

  It was a display on 'Addiction' at the library not long after my book was published and launched, which prompted me to donate a copy of my book to my local library. Almost 2 years later it is finally in circulation.  Since all copies of "My Son Went to Rehab, I Went to Rome - A Journey of Hope" are sold out and it is no longer available on Amazon for Amazon's own peculiar lack of reasoning, I am currently taking pre-paid orders for the second reprint which will have an update chapter in it. 

  

The relatively "Big News" moment for me is that tomorrow (Monday, 1 December 2025) I am re-entering the world of full-time employment and on site too! Quite an adjustment from working from home for 5 years and being my own "boss" for the last 18 months or so - one of my freelance clients (an independent law firm, Fairbridges) offered me a full-time position as Business Development Administrator and Secretary to Natasha Naidoo, director (whom I have been assisting with her business development administrator since mid-September 2025). I am allowed to continue assisting with freelance clients whom I will attend to after hours and over weekends - there are medical insurance and pension fund benefits, along with the financial security of a guaranteed income each month and December may very well be a very quiet month for me in terms of work for myself so now I have a guaranteed income. Running my own small business has been extremely stressful and that peace of mind which accompanies full-time employment is indeed priceless. Tomorrow morning my playlist will consist of sings like, "I Owe I Owe Its Off to Work I go" and "Working 9 to 5" ha ha ha!!!

I am not going to do my usual list of what I have read, what podcasts I have listed to, what I have watched on the small screen etc - there have been a lot!!

I did read and found quite brilliant, "Beach Music" by Pat Conroy. I do not know why it has taken me decades to read this but finally I have. I did not want to finish it but I did - what an incredible read. Interesting that I finished reading it on 18 October, the day of the global No Kings protests standing up for democracy, taking a stance against fascism and so much more - and this epic story from Pat Conroy starts in Rome, takes the reader to the horrors and atrocities of the concentration camps, World War II racism, antisemitism, the abhorrent atrocities of Hitler and the Nazis, to South Carolina, the low country, loggerhead turtles and the anti-Vietnam war protests, the brutality and fascism displayed by the National Guard against the protests - way too close to the reality being experienced in American cities right now, unwarranted. Such a powerful novel -fiction based on fact with no holds barred.

I am currently reading another gripping and disturbing memoir, "Nobody's Girl : A Memoir of Surviving Abuse and Fighting for Justice " by the advocate Virginia Giuffre and co-authored by Amy Wallace, about the abuse she was subjected to by Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell, Britain's former prince, Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor (whom she accused of sexual abuse when she was 17), and other influential men. It is a very hard read - after ordering it and receiving it, it took me 2 weeks to open the book. Having experienced some forms of sexual advances as a minor child by older men (not surprising that one of those men was a Presbyterian Minister) and attempts at grooming me, and surviving other atrocities in the privacy of a bedroom in my home, in my previous two marriages, I was honestly terrified to read this book but felt this compelling urge to read it, face my fears and acknowledged what happened to Virginia, far too many girls when they were minors and myself. Suffice it to say, I believe each and every one of the Epstein survivors and hope justice does prevail especially in the USA (at least in the UK action has been swift in terms of Peter Mandelson, the former UK ambassador to the US, being fired in September 2025 over revelations about the "depth and extent" of his past relationship and contact with convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein). 

Before I sign off - two rather strange events have occurred very close to home in the last couple of months. The first was a very loud noise, complete with the roaring of aeroplane engines, waking me up one morning very early - it literally sounded like an aeroplane was right above the roof of our house but when Johan said he had heard nothing, I was convinced it had just been a dream! Later that day, I saw reports on social media of other people being woken up by the very loud noise of an aeroplane right overhead and in one instance, a Mom woke up her family and got them all out of the house thinking that an aeroplane was about to crash into their home - thankfully that did not happen but none of us were dreaming. A plane had taken off from Lanseria Airport and then had to turn around to return to the same airport due to some issue or another with the plane! And on Saturday morning (yesterday) before 8.30am we were subjected to a helicopter flying very low over our complex and the neighbouring housing complex too - it was circling the area for a good 20 minutes and at one stage flew so low over our house the bushes and shrubbery in the garden were being flattened by the wind caused by the helicopter - we discovered later that the helicopter was engaged in tracking down a person suspected of criminal activity; so dramatic early on a Saturday morning!

On this eve of December, this is my wish for all of you -